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Irina Lucidi, 47, said in a telephone interview that she chose to live after her six year old girls Alessia and Livia were kidnapped by nike shoes her est nike shoes ranged husband, Matthias Schepp, on Jan. 30, 2011.”I think in an extreme situation the choice becomes very simple. You have two choices: to die or to live,” Lucidi said in her first interview with Canadian media. “I could never have the courage to kill myself.”Even though she chose to live, Lucidi says, it kills her every time a new lead surfaces.Last month, news that Italian journalist Ercole Rocchetti’s show, Chi L’Ha Visto, which investigates missing people, received a letter alleging Alessia and Livia were alive and living in Ottawa and Lachute, Que., was met by their mother with mixed emotion.”It’s hope. Hope and despair, actually, because the situation is quite desperate,” Lucidi said. “It’s actually quite violent for me.The television station turned the letter over to the police. So far, Canadian police have not been called to assist.”You get used to the worst case scenario because there’s nothing else,” Lucidi nike shoes said. “That’s the difficulty of an un closed story.”Rocchetti has received tips from two different women who say they saw Livia in Ottawa last summer.A third tip from Lachute claimed twins who resembled the missing girls attended a birthday party, Rocchetti said. A lead last September that the girls were spotted on the Italian island of Sardinia proved fruitless.It’s a roller coaster ride every time there is renewed hope only to be let down once more.Lucidi said it feels like her body shuts down. Exhaust nike shoes ion sets in.”It’s like a big shock. It’s like somebody with a baseball bat hitting you very hard.”Lucidi said she has to remind herself it might not be true that her girls are still alive, although it is possible.Schepp killed himself on Feb. 4, 2011, by jumping in front of a train in Italy, but the girls were never found.”That’s the tragedy for me. It’s a story without an end,” Lucidi said. “And it’s not just a story that belongs to me. It belongs to everyone.”Lucidi’s nightmare began to make international headlines on Jan. 30, 2011, after she went to the police.Two days earlier, Lucidi had dropped her twins off at their ballet class in Saint Sulpice, a suburb of Lausanne, Switzerland.As planned, Schepp picked them up after class to take them to his house for a weekend visit.The couple shared custody of the children since their separation in August of 2010. Schepp had the girls every second weekend and two days during the week.”I was very generous,” Lucidi said. to return the girls, Lucidi went to his house.Schepp and the girls weren’t there, but she found a handwritten will.”That’s where it started,” she said.But the Swiss police were slow to act they don’t have an Amber Alert system in Switzerland and told Lucidi she was being hysterical. Nothing would happen to the girls if they were with their father, they told her.